(Get it, "Left Behind"?)
Announcing the first annual Left ButtCheek Award, given to the single biggest idiot of the past year.
The possible recipients were numerous, including Mel Gibson, Michael Richards, Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, George W. Bush, Katherine Harris, George Allen, and Alan Hevesi.
All worthy contenders. All not quite...Darwinian enough to scoop up the award.
For blatant idiocy, I'm afraid, the award must go to that plucky little cheerleader, Kristy Yamaoka, who after falling some ten feet, broke her neck on a basketball court. As she was whisked off on a gurney, she continued cheering, thus further risking not only paralysis, but her very life itself.
For a college basketball team. Most cheerleaders only put up their virginity, and their reputations. One can only hope she didn't cause further damage by her antics.
A special mention goes out to the EMTs who escorted the gurney for not slapping her hands down then duct taping them to her sides.