WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Democratic Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton spoofed the final episode of the hit series "The Sopranos" in a video telling supporters the winning anthem for her 2008 U.S. presidential campaign was Celine Dion's "You and I."On so many technical levels, this whole song roll out is so wrong.
Canadian Dion's song had been a write-in idea but received the most votes out of the more than 200,000 cast, beating out "I'm a Believer" by Smash Mouth, "Beautiful Day" by Irish rockers U2 and Canadian Shania Twain's "Rock This Country!" among others.
1) Celine Dion is Canadian. That's no knock against her: some of our best and most beloved Americans are Canadian. But she's NOT a native-born citizen! I can only begin to imagine how the sniping will happen on this one. I expect South Park to take a lot of time, figuring out how to best skewer this. It's like shooting fish in a barrel.
2) The song, "You And I". Huh? WTF?
High above the mountainsSomeone please pass me a barf bag...
Far across the sea
I can hear your voice
Callin' out to me
Brighter than the sun
And darker than the night
I can see your love
Shinin' like a light
And on and on this earth spins like a carousel
If I could travel across the world
The secrets I would tell
You and I were meant to fly
Higher than the clouds
We'll sail across the sky
So come with me
And you will feel
That we're soaring
That we're floating up so high
'cause you and I were meant to fly
Sailng like a bird
High on the wings of love
Take me higher than
All the stars above
I'm burnin',yearnin', gently turnin' round and round
I'm always rising up
I never want to come back down
You and I were meant to fly
Higher than the clouds
We'll sail across the sky
So come with me
And you will feel
That we're soaring
That we're floating up so high
'cause you and I were meant to fly
Fly...
Fly...
Oh yeah!
You and I were meant to fly
Higher than the clouds
We'll sail across the sky
So come with me
And you will feel
That you and I were meant to fly
You and I were meant to fly
FORCRISSAKE, HIL! YOU'RE RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT, NOT PROM QUEEN! Fuck the sappy shit! Get a song that reflects what you're going to do, not some Cinderella-fucking-fantasy of waiting for "Prince Charming" to show up. Strap on a set of stones-- borrow Bill's if you have to-- and buckle up the boots! This is THE most important election since, well, 1960, if not 1992, and you're acting like the starry eyed little girl everyone is afraid you might turn out to be!
3) Speaking of Bill...here's the video to introduce the song.
OK, high marks for cleverness, but IN THE VIDEO IS THE SONG YOU SHOULD HAVE USED!
You have Bill Clinton sitting across from you. My god, the man who saved America from 19 terror attacks! The man who made the economy greater than any economy in the history of the planet! The man who presided over eight years of abject peace and unparalleled wealth!
What was HIS campaign song?
If you wake up and don't want to smileSo what's playing in the video?
If it takes just a little while
Open your eyes and look at the day
You'll see things in a different way
Don't stop thinking about tomorrow
Don't stop, it'll soon be here
It'll be better than before
Yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone
Why not think about times to come
And not about the things that you've done
If your life was bad to you
Just think what tomorrow will do
All I want is to see you smile
If it takes just a little while
I know you don't believe that it's true
I never meant any harm to you
Don't you look back
Don't you look back
Just a small town girl, livin in a lonely worldHoly fucking shit! You mean to tell me you hired all those consultants, all those advisors, all those campaign veterans, and you make a fucking bogus, Bush league mistake like having a goddamned tin ear?
She took the midnight train goin anywhere
Just a city boy, born and raised in south detroit
He took the midnight train goin anywhere
A singer in a smokey room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on
Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people, living just to find emotion
Hiding, somewhere in the night
Working hard to get my fill,
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin anything to roll the dice,
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on
Holy crap! In this one song, as much as nearly any Bruce Springsteen song, you have the soul of the average American, trying to get that one inch further up the tracks, and you choose some mealy-mouthed crappy treacle that means nothing to no one who doesn't still keep a diary with a fucking lock on it????
AND it's the perfect reminder, the perfect link, the perfect follow up to memories of the halcyon days of your husband's administration, AND I can guarandamntee you that people would respond to this song on a far more personal and visceral level.
Are you TRYING to lose, missy?????
Hillary, for $100,000, I will come over to the house in Chappaqua...don't bother giving me directions, I can find my way...and program your iPod with enough tunes, (30Gb) that don't suck, that are better than this shit.
Fer crissake!
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