Friday, July 27, 2007

Nobody Asked Me, But...

1) So China has cloned a rabbit. They weren't breeding fast enough?!?!?!?!?

2) Stuff like this never happens to me.

3) Unlike Paris Hilton, for whom I have zero sympathy, I feel for Lindsay Lohan and wish her well. She clearly had a rough childhood under the surface of placid calm and relative wealth.

To Review: Creepy skank... ...troubled drunk

4) It's nice to know that Kermit will have a place to croak.

5) They don't make rockers like they used to. One thing about growing up in New York, particularly where I did: celebrity encounters are frequent. I met Brian May in, of all places, the now-closing Discovery Store in Grand Central Station, looking at, of all things, telescopes (I could have directed him to about a hundred better stores in the city to find one). This was Spring 2001, I believe, when Queen was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. With his hair, he was taller than I am (by a lot). He's an extremely nice man, and we had a nice fan-to-icon chat, meaning he suffered me gushing.

6) Rumour has it Lindsay Lohan will be entering her next rehab with NASA.

7) The more stories like this I hear, the more I wonder where in the world Bush hasn't screwed up? Pakistan is barely holding on as an ally, they have nukes, and they have an angry Muslim population. Not good.

8) And this is not good news, on that front, either.

9) As you worry about the stock markets, keep in mind a couple of things: a) many brokers are on vaction, and b) markets never collapse on a Friday, although they have had some spectacular losses.

10) Huh? What? OHNOFUCKINGWAY! You have to be kidding me?!?!?! Why, that makes me want to KILL someone!!!!

11) Memo To NATO: Oops! It's the other guys you want to bomb!

12) Keep THIS cat away from me! (Video report here) What a sweet face for a serial killer...

13) This new Star Trek film is taking forever to get off the ground.

14) I was going to get all snarcastic on this, based on the headline, but now I can't.

15) I don't think Congress has much to worry about. If it's one thing Americans know, it's television. But just in case you weren't aware of it, you have less than eighteen months to replace your TV.

16) Take a message. I'm up to my eyeballs in manure.

17) Duh, no! Really? Anybody who's read the label can tell you this...the ultimate profit center: selling a nearly-free commodity!