Friday, October 12, 2007

Nobody Asked Me, But...


When news breaks, I pick up the pieces.

1) Turn your closet into a pantry!

2) That's now TWO THREE FOUR former Presidents of the United States who have won Nobel Peace Prizes! Congratulations, Mr. President!

3) Pooty-Poot looks like he's going to take up the Dixie Chicks mantle. First, he made Condi Rice and Robert Gates cool their heels in his antechamber ("Professor, the Dean is furious! He's waxing wroth!" "Is Roth out there, too? Tell Roth to wax the Dean for awhile." baDUMching!), then he threatened to cancel an anti-ballistic missile treaty over Bush's posturing with a new missile defense shield.

4) At least someone can stand up to this monster.

5) It looks like I'll finally be able to come out of the closet. Maybe there really is a Crusade about to take place.

6) Finally, a reason to buy a Wii:

7) You have sixty minutes before an asteroid hits the planet and wipes us out. Quick? What would you do for sixty minutes? Me, I think I'd do number two. And not just the one on the list!

8) Obviously, this bug has been married.

9) Shaun of the Engine Room.

10) $250 million for what? Good grief, is this payback for beating them in a war?

11) No. This has been another edition of "Obvious Answers To Ridiculous Questions."

12) Is it just me, or is this starting to sound like the plot from the first Batman movie?

13) The oldest wall painting yet discovered was revealed this week (see photo above). Apparently, it even predates Clement Greenberg as no scathing review accompanied it. Thanks to Miss Cellania, let me clarify: Lascaux predates this painting, but this was painted on a constructed wall and is art for art's sake.

14) Oh...and ThumbPer asked me to remind you to boycott this weekend's NYC Cat Show, since he was not personally invited to attend. He's very insulted. He barely gobbled down two bowls of cat food over the past 24 hours.