Sasquashed!

I would be excited by this story, if it was true. Somehow I doubt it.

The buzz created around Bigfoot’s recent discovery reached unprecedented heights, especially due to the promises about the upcoming "DNA evidence and photo evidence" releases, expected later today. The announcement was made by the Web site SearchingForBigfoot.com, which actually claims to have a real specimen.

According to the researchers involved, Mathew Whitton, Tom Biscardi and Rick Dyer, the creature is 7 feet and 7 inches tall, weights close to 500 pounds and presents features from both human and ape. Also, other details are offered on the Web site: the Bigfoot has reddish hair, black-gray eyes and its footprint measures almost 27 inches long and almost 6 inches across.

The evidence should be released later today during a news conference in California.

There's a ring of truth element that I sense is missing here. I can't put my finger on it, but I truly sense there's an elaborate hoax being perpetrated.

I'm not so certain of that feeling that I'd put any money on it at all, but just an unease, and my gut instinct. Perhaps it's the fact that the referenced website has already been taken down for exceeding it's bandwith (check it out).

Perhaps it's the fact that the website is registered to "registercom", one of those DIY website providers, as opposed to a legitimate commercial domain provider (Think "GoDaddy.com").

Or maybe it's the fact that the person behind the "search", Tom Biscardi, has a reputation of not making good on similar promises to produce a Bigfoot in the past, despite swearing he could capture one live on pay-per-view TV...for only $59.95!

Whatever. This smells funny, and I don't mean the freezer they stuck the corpse in wasn't working (see photo)

Now, all that said, I want to go on record saying that it wouldn't surprise me if we actually do have some North American great ape, perhaps even a hominid, running around the wilds of the country. There are 310 million Americans, and 160 million live within 150 miles of the coastlines.

That means there's an awful lot of wilderness for an intelligent species to hide in, spotted only rarely.

Too, there's enough circumstantial evidence to support the possibility. But not the probability, and there's the rub.

Tales of dragons, unicorns, fairies, and monsters have been with us since the first time the sun went down on a human being who had an imagination. Tales told around tribal campfires are no different than turning on the television and watching "proof" of UFOs: it's a uniting theory, that there are mysterious creatures around us. It reinforces tribal bonds, brings us closer against a potential common foe, and can be used to scare people into conformity ("Don't go in the forest at night!").

In many respects, these myths mirror organized religion, proposing a mystical being and endowing it with some form of control over us.

But...

Yes, I believe that one day we will likely find a creature who is close enough in appearance to justify calling him "Bigfoot" (unlike the one-horned goat that Barnum & Bailey circus fobbed off on us as an unicorn).

It will be a welcome reminder that, just as Christians don't know it all, neither do scientists. The difference, of course, is most scientists will admit that.

The reason I felt this was such an important story is, keep this tale in mind when your right wing friends start talking about this:

Two weeks before Obama accepts the Democratic nomination for president, conservative author Jerome R. Corsi has attacked his story with a narrative of his own: The son of an "alcoholic polygamist," Obama deals with his abandonment issues and "black rage" by experimenting with drugs and radical thought. He makes a calculated entrance into politics despite having accomplished little and having developed some "anti-American" sentiments. Once in office, he regularly manipulates the political machine and becomes a liberal who will "divide America."

Jerome Corsi. Tom Biscardi. P. T. Barnum.

Coincidence? Fleecing the ignorant is amazingly simple. After all, *somebody* falls for that Nigerian e-mail scam often enough that it's still popular!

(h/t to Memeorandum for showing the love)

UPDATE:

"Lee" in comments points out that parallel stories to Bigfoot have also appeared in the press recently:The Montauk Monster (probably a large dog, maybe a bull mastiff, bloated from decomposition in salt water) and a chupacabra, clearly a dog from the distinctive running motion (see video)