Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Whistling Past The Graveyard

Peggy Nooner...er, I mean, Noonan, slugged down another shot of Wild Turkey (#notintendedasafactualstatement) and cranked this out on her keyboard:
You know the conventional wisdom. It is that unemployment ticking down, plus the economy inching back, plus the power of the presidency to affect events, equals a likely Obama victory in 2012. Smart people, especially Republicans, believe this. But how about this for a thought: It's not true. It's all wrong. Barack Obama can be taken, and his adversaries haven't even noticed. In fact, he will likely lose in 2012.
"Likely lose"? In what universe, Peggers? The universe where unicorns have unibrows like you? (#notintendedasafactualstatement)
There's a very simple truth here, Peg: Obama cannot lose in 2012. Period. In fact, the best hope the Republicans have is that Obama's coattails are shorter than Bush's, so they might retain control of Congress.
That's right, Peg. I'm stating an obvious case: the Dems are threatening to dismantle the majority in the House. See, you folks keep trotting out the scare tactics, like terror alerts under Bush, or the Kenyan Kandidate Klause (the KKK), and yes, you keep some folks in line, but you lose many more with each scare tactic.
Funny thing about scare tactics is, eventually they start to turn back on you.
Take healthcare reform, in which the blast-fax talking point was "Obama will dismantle Medicare to pay for HCR". Flash forward to 2011, and who's proposing to dismantle Medicare now?
Your team. Only this scare is not only real, hell, it's a feature of your 2012 platform!
A great Republican once said "You can fool all of the people some of the time and some of the people all of the time..." but then you know the rest, Peggers.
So your braggadocio might work when giving head to the editorial board of the Wall Street Journal (#notintendedasafactualstatement...maybe), but beyond those piano-wire topped walls, your pleas fall on deaf ears.
But we take comfort in your desperation.