Friday, April 17, 2009

Nobody Asked Me, But...

1) In fairness, her blowdryer DID look like a gun.
2) Rush Limbaugh. Like a fruitcake, he's the gift that keeps on giving, even tho you really don't want it.
3) I'm sorry, did I say "like a fruitcake"? He IS a fruitcake! Just ask any of his two, err, three, errr, four, errr, five? Four...four wives!
4) JammieWearingFool lives up to the last part of his name. Maybe he ought to buy a suit and get a job? Quoting a blind item about NBC worrying about being Obama's opposition network in the NY Post then claiming Fox News is the opposition network-- when the Post is OWNED by News Corp. and clearly this blind item was made up out of whole shit-- is like me quoting the Democratic Underground about, well, right wing terrorism. Or worse, me quoting Paris Hilton about how awful Obama's tax hikes will be.
5) One final funny note on the Teabagging on Wednesday: The DC protestors forgot to secure permits to dump a million teabags in the DC park they were authorized to protest in, thus missing the opportunity to have at least a decent visual for the nightly news. Instead, a conservative think tank funded in large part by the RNC offered the use of their conference room. On the twelfth floor. Of a building with tiny elevators. Meaning it took two people a few dozen trips up and down to take all those tea bags up, dump them in the conference room, take some pictures, then leave them for the non-union undocmented cleaning crew to cart out later that night!
6) One final UNfunny note on the Teabagging on Wednesday: If ur calling a President wif a 60% approval rating "fascist" on th' nashunal teevee, ur doin it wrong!
7) You are one of two major league baseball teams in the largest city in America, both opening a brand new stadium in the middle of the worst depression since World War II. Your stadium was paid in large part with public funds and one of the two team's field is named after a de-facto bankrupt multinational bank. Who do you get to sing your national anthem? A legendary singer associated with New York City, like Billy Joel (who has played both former stadiums), or Paul Simon, maybe even Tony Bennett? No. A legendary opera singer, like Renee Fleming or Placido Domingo? No. A famous Broadway performer like Sutton Foster or even Glenn Close who lives here and is a big baseball fan? No.
You get the ensemble cast of a failed revival of West Side Story or a near-washed up former American Idol winner.
Excuse me? YOU'RE FUCKING NEW YORK TEAMS! Why in the hell are you humping a Broadway show done worse than a high school production and a barely-tolerable singer humping her new album??? This is Yankee Stadium! This is the new home of the Mets! It's no wonder karma bit you both on the ass and made you embarass yourselves in the home openers!
9) It's just pork and beans!
10) Mr. President, it's not just about turning the page. It's about justice and human rights. If we truly want "Never Again," we have to make sure it happens never again, no matter what the cause or reason.