Bush Is Running Out Of Friendly Audiences

WARNING: Heavy snark ahead.

Bush addresses Kings Point grads

BY CRAIG GORDON
Newsday Washington Bureau

June 19, 2006, 12:00 PM EDT

President George W. Bush received a very warm welcome this morning at the U.S. Merchant Marine Academy in Kings Point -- from the weather and the crowd.

Praising their service in war and at peace as exemplifying the "spirit of America and the spirit of this fine academy," Bush Monday became the first sitting president to address graduates of the academy.

Oh, how nice! Another service academy for Dumbya to stand up in front of and feel his OB-GYN lovin' from! Pretty impressive, speaking at one of them service academies that help fight that war over there on terror.

Oh wait. What exactly IS the "Merchant Marine," anyway?

There are tankers traveling along the west coast with raw petroleum for our refineries; Great Lakes vessels loaded with iron ore, coal or other minerals for America's industry; huge containerships in Eastern ports, their box-like containers filled with manufactured goods; general cargo ships in the Gulf unloading pallets of coffee and crates of fruit; tugboats pushing and pulling barges carrying the Midwest's grain.

These kinds of vessels, owned by U.S. companies, registered and operated under the American flag, comprise the U.S. merchant marine.

Grain? Ore? Petr...CARGO SHIPS?!?!?!?

Hm, no wonder "Bush Monday became the first sitting president to address graduates of the academy." All the other Presidents weren't as desperate to have us like him, really really LIKE him!

So while "Sally Field" was off speechifying at a low-level cargo port where they're too cheap to hire Teamsters, we're finding out that the American Embassy in Iraq is scared shitless to be there, Condi Bush Rice was warning North Korea about building a missile that could deliver a payload to the Western United States (memo to Dubya: It'd be a little less ingenuous to withhold terror funding form New York if you didn't make a big stink about this missile which apparently can reach Wyoming's ranch country), and New Yorkers were dealing with the revelation that, in fact, that stench they smelled in 2003 wasn't some homeless guy crapping his pants, but may have been a test of a new delivery system for cyanide gas from Al Qaeda. Lovely.

Bush's day? He got gifts:

During his visit, Bush was presented a ceremonial scabbard and a copy of the "Presidential Pets March," written specially for him to commemorate his two dogs, Barney and Miss Beazley, and his cat, India.

Yeesh.

snarkasm, snarcasm, snarky

Bush
Al Qaeda
merchnat marine
North Korea